Hero
by Christian West
Summary: "You saved her from an armed subject without firing a single shot. That's a hero in my books" He knew he saved her. He knew he was worth something. Spencer Reid was a Hero, but he chose not to accept the title. Better summary inside.
1. The Stresser

**Hero**

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><p><strong>By Christian West<strong>

**Summary - "You saved her from an armed subject without firing a single shot. That's a hero in my books" Spencer Reid was a hero, he knew that. All he wanted was acceptance from that one person, in all senses of the word. Accept him for what he did, tell him it's OK, accept him for what he's done, he's said, what he is. Spencer Reid was torn. He didn't feel like a hero.**

**Themes - AU, eventual romance, angst, hurt/comfort, homophobia, cutting, self-harm, blood, relapses, MPD, mentions of rape and child prostitution. Things are added all the time...**

**AN/ A reviewer has said that this is OOC and too short. I promise that the chapters will get longer, but at the moment, they will be short, some long, but short ones sometimes give the effect I need. The characters are OOC, and this will change and/or explained in following chapters.**

**AN/ This is currently quite dark, but it will get lighter in the next few chapters.**

**IF YOU DISLIKE ANY OF THE THEMES LISTED ABOVE, DO NOT READ THIS STORY**

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><p>"You saved her from an armed subject without firing a single shot. That's a hero in my books. Besides-"<p>

"Have you ever crossed the boundaries in a professional job by doing something trivial?"

"Dude, a kiss is trivial. Saving a _life_ isn't."

"So if it's trivial then I can do this"

He got up from his chair, wrapped his arms around the strong neck and kissed the open lips. Hard. The assaulted mouth opened to gasp, and he took the opportunity to slip his tongue inside, battling for dominance.

They broke away panting lightly.

"Trivial. That's all it was."

"Plea-"

"Shut up Reid. I'm not like you. I don't like you"

Derek Morgan shook his head and ran out the room, grabbing his jacket as he went. Reid sat back down, closing his eyes. Lights turned off and Spencer was in darkness.

It wouldn't be the first time


	2. The Dark

_Ring. Ring. _

_Ring. Ring. _

_Ring. Ring. _

Derek Morgan groaned and rolled over, groping the bedside table for his phone. He'd had a long night out at one of his local clubs, and when he got back it was nearing three o' clock. The last case was pretty intense, and he'd needed to excitement; not the 'I'm about to die, and so is someone else'. If that wasn't bad enough, Clooney had bounded up barking madly, demanding to be fed. He couldn't catch a break.

"Whattya want Hotch"

"Wake up and get down to the BAU. We've got another case. Bring your go bag."

"Why didn't JJ call? Am I late?"

"On the contrary, you are one of the first I called. This is a _personal _case. JJ doesn't know just yet. Hurry up though."

"Bye Hotch"

Derek hung up, slightly confused. He shook his head and headed for the bathroom. In the next five and half minutes, he showered, had quick bite to eat, grabbed a go bag and left. At five thirty am, he walked into the BAU, and headed straight to the meeting room to wait for the others.

Memories flashed in front of his eyes as he remembered last night. His hand touched his lips before he could register it, but he quickly shook the feelings away.

The rest of the team met up outside the entrance of the BAU, as requested by Hotch. Penelope Garcia stepped forward first, looking slightly confused, and tired. Aaron knew that the last case had been trying, and he hated to bring them in, but this particular matter couldn't wait.

"If you don't mind me asking sir, why are we here? JJ hasn't given us a case."

Sounds of agreement rippled round the group. Their leader looked everyone in the eye before saying,

"Has it occurred to any of you that we are missing some people?"

Heads whipped around, and murmurs of 'Derek' and 'Reid' were thrown about. Hotchner coughed a few times to get their attention before speaking again.

"I arrived early this morning to finish off paperwork I had left over, when I heard crying from the desks. It was dark, and I had no idea who it was. I went to check the CCTV footage to see if it was anyone we knew. Turns out, Reid and Morgan were engaging in some sort of conversation last night, and Reid kissed him." Aaron waited for that to sink in before he continued, "Morgan said something and stormed out, leaving behind a shell shocked Spencer. Reid then collapsed to the floor, and stayed there. He'd been there all night. Thanks to Garcia, I can only access video, and didn't get any sound."

"Where is he now?" Asked David Rossi "Is he alone?"

"Yes, he is. He's in Garcias 'cave', curled up under a table. It took a lot of coaxing to get him there from under the table. We didn't want the rest of the BAU seeing him in this condition. He hasn't stopped mumbling 'I'm still the same' and 'I'm not weak' since we got him there. Any reasons why you're so stressed David?"

"Are there any sharp objects in there Garcia?"

"U-um… just the usual: circuit boards, a few wires, stationary like scissors, paper, staples, pens, etcetera. Why?"

"Come with me, the rest of you stay here"

The remaining team protested, but Hotch held out a hand to silence them. It had slipped his mind earlier, but he remembered why David seemed so stressed.

"Trust me. Don't bother"

"So what do we do?" Asked Emily "Wait until they return?"

"No. We go find out what made Spencer fall apart, right from the source" smirked JJ.


	3. The Truth

**Disclaimer - I do not own Criminal Minds, and the idea for Reid crying was from **Purplehonor. 

**Pairings - Eventual Reid/Morgan**

**Genres/Warnings - Angst, Tragedy, Blood, Self-Harm, Mentions of Rape, Beatings, etc**

Striding down the corridors, David Rossi was a man on a mission. Garcia jogged slightly behind him, confused.

"Sir! What-"

"Not now Penelope. He's had a rather – traumatic - childhood. More than he's told. You know his mother is a paranoid schizophrenic, and his dad left them, but what else do you know?"

"He was bullied, and he…..he….I don't know"

"He came out at thirteen at an English Sixth Form, but they didn't take it well. They called him weak, and beat him up, and a few of them gang raped him, including one of his friends. That's why he's muttering those phrases. He transferred back here when they temporarily blinded him by punching his eyes. He had asked a boy out, but he said more or less what Morgan said. Hence the shock. The hospital had to keep him in intensive care for three months, because some of the wounds had set wrong and had to be re-broken, but the worst thing was they caught him-" Here Rossi stopped to push open Garcias door "Doing that" Rossi ran over to Reid, who had stapled his arms with about forty staples, and was hacking scissors into his wrists. His head was bleeding, and some of the blood was on the table he was propped against, suggesting that he had banged his head against it a few times, and broken the skin. David wrestled Reid's hands above his head, forcing him to stop and drop the stationary.

"Garcia, get Hotch in here, and grab a first aid kit too. Tell him he did it again"

"O-o-okay. Is he going to be alright?"

"Get. Hotch. Now."

"On it"

As soon as the tech analyst left the room, the writer dropped Reid's arms, making sure the scissors were out of reach.

"Can you tell me your name?"

"Spencer Reid. Who are you? Why do you wanna know?"

"I'm David Rossi. We met a while back"

"I have an eidetic memory. I would remember you."

"Can you tell me your age?"

"Isn't it obvious? I'm thirteen, and-" Here he stopped to check his watch "late for my plane to England. Where am I anyway?"

"You're in the BAU, Virginia"

"Oh"

Spencer Reid promptly passed out in the arms of Rossi, blood pooling on the carpet around him.

_Hurry up Hotch_

Emily Prentiss, Jennifer Jareau, and Aaron Hotchner stormed into the meeting room, the latter starting first.

"Please tell me you have a reasonable excuse as to why one of my best agents was found crying under his desk at three forty five this morning?"

"Well sorry, but I don't take too well to being kissed by filthy homos late at night!"

"What the _hell _is wrong with you Morgan?" demanded Emily, "You never acted like this before!"

"Yeah" agreed JJ, "The Derek Morgan I know wouldn't reject his best friend like that"

"Well you don't see him like I did then"

"Which is what?" Questioned Hotch.

"An abuser of trust. We're like brothers. We tell each other everything." Aaron sighed.

"This is one thing he couldn't tell you"

"How come?"

"I don't have the authority to tell you"

"But Hotch-" Garcia burst in at that moment effectively cutting them off. She looked a little pale, and was clutching a first aid kit

"Umm, Rossi said to tell you that 'he did it again', and you need to come immediately."

"I'll be back in a second guys" He followed Penelope out the door, and together they rushed to the room.

The sight they were greeted by was 52 year old pulling staples out of a 28 year olds arms. Hotch ran over to help whilst Garcia stood stock still.

"You either help or go."

"And before you ask, he won't go to hospital. He's trapped in his thirteen year old mind set, so when he wakes he'll be trapped in his worst memories." Their voices got hushed and Garcia had to strain to hear over her pounding heart and the frantic gasping from her favourite Doctor.

"Shall we put him in _that_ room?"

"Is all of the equipment still in there?"

"Should be. I'll check it out when he's more stable."

"Okay"

Garcias eyes wandered over to the limp body and promptly ran out the door her hands over her mouth. _Too much blood. _She fell to the floor and promptly vomited all over it.

Back in the room, Hotch and Rossi were un-stapling Reid, and bandaging and cleaning all the other wounds. Every so often the body in their arms would jerk or the face would scrunch up in pain, but it didn't distract them. They worked for half an hour, to the best of their abilities, until Spencer's breathing evened out and he looked calm.

They got up, straightening and dusting off their suits, and brushing the dried blood from their hands. David strode out to check on the room, whilst Hotch guarded his agent. The same thoughts ran through their minds.

_I'm gonna kill Morgan._


	4. The Questions

Dark.

Dark.

Pain.

Dark.

Dark.

Dark.

Dark.

Pain.

Dark.

Dark.

Dark.

Voices.

Dark.

Silence.

How long had he been out?

Minutes? Maybe…

Hours? Possibly….

Days? Likely….

Where was his mom?

Was she eating? Maybe…

Was she asleep? Possibly….

Did she remember her medication? Likely….

How did he get there?

Abduction? Maybe…

Dreaming? Possibly….

A mistake? Likely….

What was going on?

For once, Spencer Reid didn't have the answer.


	5. The School

_**The next chapter is up, and I have another pre-written~ Reviews are welcome xx I'm going to try to update every Tuesday and Saturday, for those interested :)**_

_**Disclaimers ch1 + 3**_

_**Enjoy xx**_

_A young Spencer Reid stepped into a bright classroom, and gazed around in awe. These people were at least four years older than him. The teacher noticed him standing awkwardly to the side, and decided to do something._

"_Class, this is Spencer. He'll be joining us from now on." The class rolled their eyes and said_

"_Morning Spencer" The teacher smiled in approval. She ushered him to an empty seat and let them swarm him._

"_How old are you?"_

"_Where are you from?"_

"_Do you have any friends yet?"_

"_Do you have a favourite book?"_

"_Any special talents?" Spencer shrank back in his seat and tried to become invisible. The kid next to him noticed his ordeal and did something about it._

"_Guys back of, he's uncomfortable. Let him answer in his own time, okay?" The rest of the class grumbled, but Reid smiled appreciatively. _

"_Thanks" he whispered._

"_No problem. I'm James by the way."_

"_Spencer, but you already knew that." He turned warily to the rest of the class. "Ok, I'm eleven years old, from Nevada, no_, _Phantastes at the moment, an eidetic memory I guess."_

"_You're eleven?" said one girl._

"_Yeah"_

"_How are you in this class?" she frowned "This class is the top class for eleventh grade. We're the gifted and talented students of this school. You're eleven."_

"_Well, seeming as I wasn't challenged in my previous class, and I have a current IQ of 166, I'd say that I can stay in this class" The girl turned pink and stormed off._

_The rest of the day was the same. When people saw him walking around, they would either ask his questions to challenge his intelligence or treat him like a nine year old. Over the course of the day, he'd recited pi to 68000 decimal places, named every current monarchy and their respective children, and pretty much whatever anyone wanted that he knew. When he didn't know, they would laugh, and he'd say that he was at school for a reason. _

_In the weeks that followed, the novelty wore off, and people didn't bother him. Spencer didn't mind. He had James. And his mom. She cared greatly for him, and listened to his day every time he came home from school._

_James turned into his best friend faster than he could recite statistics. They walked to and from school together, and sat next to each other in class. James went to Spencer's for tea, and Spencer went to James' for tea. They would have chill days and movie nights. Spencer even taught James how to play chess at a global standard. In return, James taught him classical and modern violin._

_When school hit the sixth month mark, everything changed. People began to prepare for exams, and would come to him for help. When he refused, saying they should have paid attention, they threatened him into it. He went to school scared, and spent the rest of the day and some of the night writing up notes and help cards. When he missed his deadline, the 'client' as Spencer dubbed them, would corner him and beat him for every hour it was late. It was excruciating, but the reasoning behind it stuck in his mind. _

_If you were late, you'd get __**pain.**_

_It went on for months, until the exams were over. But even then the torment continued. As soon as the grades came out, and Spencer's was the highest, it started all over again._

"_Why are you so smart?"_

"_I bet you cheated"_

"_Cheat!"_

_Spencer was eventually passing out from the pain in class, and the parents and teachers were called in. They pushed him to tell who was doing it, and gave them each an individual telling off, and made them apologise in front of the class. On the last day of term, Miss Joyei-Xiqu, the form tutor, made an announcement on Spencer's behalf._

"_Mr Reid will not be returning after the holidays" The class looked startled to say the least._

"_Why?" asked Kendra, one of Reid's friends. As far as she knew, he was staying._

"_The school got a call today, from an English college. They said they had noticed young Spencer's talent, and wanted to put it to the test. He'll be joining the colleges Sixth Form, and participating in some tests as well." She nodded to Spencer. Despite her Chinese heritage, and the stereotypes associated with it, her accent was soft and mostly American, and soothed Spencer's nerves. Her eyes connected with his as she said:_

"_We wish him the best of luck"_

_For the first time in over 7 months, Spencer Reid walked out of class happy._


	6. The Room

**The next chapter is here~ Any mistakes let me know~ By the way, chapters in italics are flashbacks and will be either 1st or 2nd person, but you will know who it is~**

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><p>Back in the real world, Dr Spencer Reid was thrashing about. Luckily Hotch and Rossi had managed to get him to the Room and secure him. They had created the room two years when a case had caused Spencer to relapse, and the Doctors had the hospital had advised it. They had also given strict instructions as to what to do in certain situations and how to handle others.<p>

When the Doctor had asked if they had a room that no-one would bother them in, they had thought for at least two hours, before consulting the architects who built it. As it turned out, there was a room close to Garcias cave that was supposed to be a secure infirmary that doubled as an interrogation room when their UnSubs were mentally unstable. It required hand print activation, and as soon as they discovered it, Hotch and Rossi were placed in the system.

The room was now equipped with various medications, as well as various things to aid healing. Bandages, plasters, slings, splints were tucked away on shelves, along with other things that were needed the last time they helped Spencer. Un-staplers, glue dissolvent, there was quite a list.

At the moment, Reid was tied to a hospital bed with leather straps round his wrists, upper elbows, torso, thighs and ankles. They were reinforced after he broke free the first time, and were specially made so as not to create as much friction. The room itself consisted of soft carpet and bullet proof glass in the guise of blue wallpaper.

There was a conjoining room that was set up with monitors so they could check on their charge, and also surrounded three of the glass walls. The door was well hidden, but the closest to the bed when needed.

The fourth wall covered a storage room that was connected to the other room. Overall it was a pretty impressive area built for one person. Only Strauss, Hotch, Rossi and some third party medical staff knew about it. No-one else did.

The latter two were currently observing their charge, which had stopped thrashing and was sleeping soundly. A bandage was wrapped round his neck and there were also bandages all the way up his forearms. His face was scrunched up in pain, and small trickle of blood ran down his chin from where he'd bitten his tongue. Hotch had sedated him as soon as his eyes fell shut, giving them enough time to tell the team, and interview Morgan.

They left a nurse watching the monitors, ready to page them if anything happened, and strode down the corridors. Both their auras screamed _pissed, _and people backed off. They stormed into the meeting room, immediately greeted by three faces.

"Where's Garcia?" They asked in unison. Prentiss frowned

"Throwing up next door. She'll be out in a minu-" At that moment Garcia walked out of the conjoining bathroom looking decidedly pale.

"Sorry about that, guys." And then upon noticing her superiors "I'll try better next time?"

"No need." Stated Hotch "We want you all in here, except for you Morgan. Please wait outside." Derek growled and looked at the floor, and walked out. Aaron turned back to the group.

"There is something we need to tell you"


	7. The Hate

**_Don't know whether you noticed, but chapters in italics are flashbacks. Someone PMed me, so I thought I would remind you. And some of this is AU!_**

**_Happy reading xx_**

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><p><em>18 year old Derek Morgan was walking home from Judo, pleased that he had finally achieved 1<em>_st__ Dan, when he was ambushed by some school students. He recognised them as __Devada Coldmore, Proteus Oaker and Daemon Jones, __the latter of which surprised him greatly. Daemon Jones had just come out as gay, and no-one liked him because of it. Derek did, as he had been brought up to be accepting. Needless to say he was shocked when he was tackled to the ground and savagely beaten. Then a thought crossed his mind. He gaped. _Daemon is 2 grades higher than me in Judo. _How had he not remembered._

_Before he could speak his theory, Jones jumped to it. _

"_I know you don't like me, no-one does, but I want to know why" Derek blinked a few times to clear the blurriness from his vision and spat out a lump of blood._

"_I d' l'ke y'u" he slurred out. "Y'u're aw's'me."_

"_LIAR!"_

"_Not lyin'"_

"_You are! You just don't wanna be hurt anymore. Newsflash! We're gonna break you."_

Derek Morgan would have died if not for the police officer who spotted them in the alley way…

_Derek saw the officer draw his taser, and proceeded to prop himself on his elbows, despite the pain. 'You can do better than that' his body language said. Daemon snarled…and promptly dropped to the ground, twitching. The other two followed._

_The police officer offered a hand, and helped him up, wincing as he did so. His back was grazed; his body was tender, his wrist and leg more so. His lip was split, and his mouth was filling with blood. The adrenaline that was coursing through his veins promptly vanished, and he dropped to the floor once again._

_By the time all his wounds caught up with him he already made his decision. He realised that if everyone reacted like that when they came out they were just douche bags. Filthy, homosexual, douche bags. He would hate them._

_From this day forth, Derek Morgan would hate anything gay and anything related to it._


	8. The Talk

**Don't laugh at the chapter title...it makes more sense than the others i came up with...**

**Changing updates to at least twice a week, once during and once at the weekend.**

**This fic is slow moving but it gets better and slightly more complicated...not much.**

**Another AN at the end.**

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><p>SSA Aaron Hotchner was about to tell his team everything when David Rossi interrupted him.<p>

"It's not our story to tell" he whispered, pulling the agent to the side.

"I know"

"So why're you….?"

"Trust me David" Said man shook his head and released his grip.

"As I was saying" continued Hotch "Dr Spencer Reid arrived here when he was 18, after completing all of the qualifications he has at the moment. He wanted to make a difference, and was more than qualified, despite his 'skills' with firearms. Two years after, we were working a case where a kid was getting bullied and was turning very slowly into a sociopath. Spencer had a relapse and after a lot of unfortunate results we decided it best to seek out counselling for him. He spent months getting counselled and we thought he would be fine.

"We were hesitant when the rest of you joined, as we thought it may trigger him, but you guys proved us wrong. His doctor even said she had noticed a visible improvement in him. I bet none of you knew he had appointments every week did you?

"We can't tell you much, as he will tell when he's ready, but what did happen had a significant effect on him, and it took a trip to intensive care for him to realise he needed to open up more, slowly or not. He is more broken than you know. His last episode trapped him in memories, and the same has happened today. We consider you guys family to him, and that is why we are telling you this, even briefly.

"Do you see our pagers?" The remaining team looked up with varying expressions, but pushed the feelings away to nod. Aaron continued

"Reid is in a special room with his on site doctor, and if anything happens that is too much or too personal for her then we are alerted. Only three people know of this room, David, Strauss and I, and the doctor of course."

"Today" Rossi continued "We are bestowing you with a huge amount of trust. We are going to programme you into the system, give you pagers and allow you to be contacts if anything happens and neither of us are here. We'll take you one at a time to see him when he wakes and is more stable than before. It is also a requirement to read his folder and medical files first. If you don't, or can't, you are not permitted to see him"

"Any questions?" Rossi smiled softly when Prentiss raised her hand calmly. He nodded to her

"Two questions. One: Was he raped? Two: How long was the last relapse?"

Hotch and Rossi glanced at each other and had a silent conversation

_Should've known_

_She guessed though_

_Just nod_

_Not like we're telling her anyway_

_What a child_

_Shut up_

"Yes. He was raped" He took in Garcias form clinging to JJs and Prentiss' eyes flash in anger.

"The last relapse lasted 2 months."

At that moment, the pagers began to buzz and flash, and the two agents left the girls alone with their thoughts.

They reached the rooms just in time, as Spencer in a thirteen year old mind set began to scream and hit the windows.

"No no no no no no no no no" He sobbed, his previous energy gone "Lemme go! Lemme go! Lem-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH No no no no no no no no no no no no. Someone! HELP! "

Then silence.

The two men knew they couldn't help, as the last time they tried it did more harm than good. They continued monitoring him as he screamed and cursed until they got to a bit they knew too well. This memory was earlier than the others, and it was one of the times they first got him. They waited until he looked up, his eyes dead yet searching the very depths of the soul. He lifted a hand to the glass he didn't know was there then brought it back as if he was slapped. He held it to his chest for a while, and then it began.

His nails dragged down his skin, as if he was trying to be rid of something. He clawed at his chest, his eyes, his arms, his legs and anywhere he could touch.

Hotch and Rossi shed their jackets and ran in, pushing him back to the bed, and strapping up his wrists in the leather. They then dropped their hard attitudes and soothed and whispered to the boy, who now was sobbing hard into David's shoulder.

"Its OK"

"They won't come back"

"They can't get you anymore"

"We'll protect you"

"There is nothing wrong with you"

"You are loved"

At the last sentence the child, for that's all he was, wailed and buried his head into Rossi's lap. Hotch tentatively began stroking his brown locks in a calming gesture as raw emotions flowed out of the little genius. They stayed in that position until he fell asleep, then left the room.

"I understand that with love comes pain, but why did he have to love so much?"

"Love means exposing yourself to the pain of being hurt, deeply hurt by someone you trust."

"Except in his case it was more pain than he imagined"

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><p><strong>AN - Yo. If you want a one shot of any kind then go to ma page for terms and conditions :) I'm bored and need to write more...**

**If anyone has names I could use for Reids tormenters, and his partener I am open to suggestions ;)**

**Reviews make me happy, but I'm not an author that goes _i want x amount of review before i update. _I'm just happy that I have 56 nationalities reading this and over 6000 hits~ Thanks guys~ Danke, merci, arigato...cba to do more ;D**

**Cool.**

**Aku out~**


	9. The Pagers

**Next chapter is here~ I'm going to try update at least once a week, but maybe more if I feel like it~ Just to remind you, chapters in italics are flashbacks, and will start with the initials of the character name. The next chapter is a flashback, and the chapter after that is a monologue/inner ramble kind of thing~**

**Thanks to my lovely reveiwers, and without further ado, the next chapter of Hero~**

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><p>JJ, Emily and Garcia stood outside the metal door feeling awkward. Despite the fact that the door was supposed to be sound proofed, odd screams could still be heard through the thick iron. Each time they heard one, they would wince and look down. It seemed like a lifetime before they heard the locks click and squeak of the door as it opened.<p>

The two men that emerged looked tired and worn and were in deep conversation until Rossi noticed the women in his peripheral vision. He fixed them with a glare and almost immediately they all tried to explain, stumbling over their words and speaking over one another. Hotchner raised a hand to his head and sighed

"One at a time please"

"Sorry sir!" blurted Garcia "It was just- It looked important- We wanted- Is he alright?"

"He's fine. We don't blame you for following either. You're going to have to see at some point. Lets programme you in shall we. All we need is a hand"

The women were all amazed at how calm the two men were, dealing with what they were. They guessed it must be practice, but there should be at least some discomfort.

"If you don't think you can handle it, turn back. It took us sixteen months to learn how to cope with this" And there it was.

David and Aaron waited for any signs of discomfort, before proceeding.

"Emily, place your hand the sensor. Don't move it. Wait a second. Now type your full name in. Preferred name. Basic profile. Unique pin code of five numbers. Security question and answer. Left hand thumb, index, middle, ring, little. Same for right hand. All done. Next, JJ" The procedure was repeated for both Garcia and JJ and once finished they stepped back.

Rossi's hand dipped into his pocket and retrieved four pagers. They were sleek and black with stripes and flecks of colour. The first was Rossi's, as it had a tiny Italian flag on it, but the others were different.

The first was Garcias as the flecks were neon pink and it was decorated with little pictures of cute cartoons and animals.

The second was JJs and had little footballs over it and on the back, a picture of Henry.

The last one was for Prentiss and had green flecks and little snakes on it. I was common knowledge in the BAU than Prentiss was a hardcore Harry Potter fan, and spent most of her free time re-reading the series or going to conventions.

Each of the women seemed pleased with them, despite the context they were being used in.

"Each pager is connected to Reids heart moniter, so if his pulse quickens, a light will flash orange. His nurse also has one and if he is violent it will flash red. The green flashing light is just in case you need assistance for changing bandages etc. Only two in at a time, so if you get there first, press the blue button, and your name will pop up on the other pagers, alerting them that you are there.

"For the first few days, you will need either Hotch or me in with you, so we can teach you what to do. There are a few medical folders to look through, but they're in my office. Other than that…"

"I think that's everything. Questions?"

The girls looked dumbstruck. Everything was going so fast.

"We'll give you a minute to get your bearings then we'll show you his rooms, give you a chance to test the system"

Caught up in the moment, no-one had noticed the lone figure standing in the shadows of the corridor, excluded from his previous room and left to wander. He stood tall a smirk plastered on his face. Those folders sounded interesting.

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><p><strong>A<strong>**ll done~ Reviewers get cookies and man-cakes~ (gods know how, but hey, always fun to write) And PM me for oneshots~!**


	10. The Decision

**New chapter is here! I apologise for the homophobia in ch7, I hated writing it, and the huge continuity error. For those who did notice, and for those who didn't, Derek was thankful to the police officer for saving his life, for he would have died, then shortly after he gets up, and is fine apart froma few scrathes. I APOLOGISE FOR SUCH A HORRIBLE MISTAKE!**

**Italics is inner turmoil, so have fun!**

** Disclaimer ch1 or 3 :D**

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><p>Derek Morgan had gone for a walk.<p>

Not a long one.

Not a short one.

Just a walk.

He wandered round aimlessly, before finally coming back to his desk in the bullpit. He gazed in longing at the meeting room, torn between his curiosity to know what they were talking about, his hate for _those _people, and his brotherly love for Spencer. He growled in frustration and got up, slamming his chair into the desk as he left.

This time his walk led him to a bathroom, seldom used by the staff in the BAU, due to the distance it was from the centre of the building, and therefore their work. Morgan wiped the grime off the mirror, staring at his face.

His eyes were losing their happiness, and bags were growing beneath them. Lines marred his forehead from excessive frowning, something he'd been doing a lot of recently. His shirt was creased, as were his trousers. Overall, Derek Morgan was a mess.

_What am I doing! I can't just push my friends away. I mean I've known Spencer longer than anyone; he's practically my little brother. I can't change my thoughts about him, just because of one little thing! But it's not really that little is it. I mean I've spent years telling myself that homosexuals are bad {which they are}, when I'm bi myself! And half caste. Why should I be so annoyed? Not like they chose to be gay, to be mocked, not like I chose to be dark-skinned, and ridiculed. In a way we're the same! {Not! They're filthy! Just like Daemon!} No, I was wrong, he was sly. It had nothing to do with his sexuality. I realise that now. {Still, you've just caused your team to pretty much hate you} Shit! I can't really go apologise can I! They think I'm a spoiled ignorant brat now! I can't display my sincerity either. They won't believe me! I was out of line…..Damn it, Jonah, why you gotta take over when I need to be logical! {You don't gotta choice. But when you gotta make one, or ya stressed, you turn to me. Into me. Et voila~} Oh shut it._

Derek ceased his inner musings and turn away from the mirror. He smoothed off his clothes, and strode outside, intent on making things better, as he turned the corner he heard Hotch and Rossi talking. Immediately Jonah took over, and hid in the shadows, eavesdropping. The voices carried in the almost empty corridor, and Jonah found himself wondering how they were so stealthy usually if this was how they spoke about private matters. He shook his head and proceed to listen. At the moment, Rossi was talking about Reid

"- Reids heart moniter, so if his pulse quickens, a light will flash orange. His nurse also has one and if he is violent it will flash green flashing light is just in case you need assistance for changing bandages etc. Only two in at a time, so if you get there first, press the blue button, and your name will pop up on the other pagers, alerting them that you are there.

"For the first few days, you will need either Hotch or me in with you, so we can teach you what to do. There are a few medical folders to look through, but they're in my office. Other than that…" Jonah stifled a laugh. Reid was _dangerous! _Too funny. Oh right, eavesdropping.

"I think that's everything. Questions?"

JJ and Prentiss were looking dumbstruck, and confused. Their lips were parted slightly more than usual, the BAU version of gaping.

"We'll give you a minute to get your bearings then we'll show you his rooms, give you a chance to test the system"

As soon as the corridor was vacated, all its previous occupants either in Reids room or in their offices in different parts of the building, Derek set off. Jonah was half in charge, leading the way, whilst Derek was just curious.

A few minutes later found what looked like Derek (and was actually Jonah) sitting in Hotches office, reading Spencers files. He was on the second last page when the rest of the team walked in.

"What are you doing?"

_{Ahh shit} _

_How'd you figure…._


	11. The Thought

**Alright new chapter~ Sorry its late, I've been at my Dads, and the internet is awkward to say the least. Next chapter up soon, and they are getting longer. Anyways, one update a week for the moment xx Read on my fanficlings?**

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><p><em>Since leaving his old high school one year ago, Spencer Reid had accomplished many things. He had graduated from Caltech with a PhD in Chemistry, the fastest recorded time in over a decade, and had stayed in contact with the Chancellor of Cambridge University, to finalise his plans there for the future.<em>

_Spencer was spending two years in England getting a PhD in Mathematics and then returning to Caltech to get a PhD in Engineering. He had spent the past year making sure he knew where the University was, how to get there, holidays, classes, dorm rooms and other things like that. Two days before he graduated, Reid's flight was booked, and he would be leaving the day after graduation._

_Graduation was a lonely affair for the genius, as he had few close friends. His mother was too dazed to come, and his father…Spencer only stayed for the required time, and then quietly slipped away. He spent the remainder of the day packing for his trip. The next day he left his mothers Doctor strict instructions on what to do in specific conditions and all her medication, and then promptly left. _

_He ended up taking a bus to the city centre, then a train to the airport, as opposed to a long coach journey. The whole journey took about ten and a half hours, and when he stepped onto British soil he was drained. It was quite a trip for a thirteen year old._

_He was standing outside Heathrow airports main entrance when a sleek black car pulled up in front of him. The driver stepped out and opened the door to another man; one Spencer knew to be Lord Sainsbury of Turville. He inclined his head in greeting._

"_Chancellor"_

"_Dr Reid. Ready to go?"_

"_Am I riding with you, sir?"_

"_Of course. Unless my mind fails me, that is what we agreed last week, isn't it?"_

"_Yes sir. Sorry for doubting"_

_The Chancellor shook his head in amusement, then gestured to the chauffeur, who strode over and opened the doors for them. Reid's bag went in the boot and he got in beside Lord Sainsbury._

_The car journey was less than eventful, as they spoke about trivial things; academia, weather, differences between England and America. Every so often, when conversation starters came up short, Reid was gaze out of the window, wondering what life would be like if he were normal. Mentally he was scoffing, as no one person is normal. Normal to one is abnormal to another. But he meant if he wasn't a prodigy, no eidetic memory, no paranoid schizophrenic mother, a dad who cared - - a proper family. _

_He sighed for the umpteenth time, and resumed conversation with the Chancellor._

_After two hours they were there, and Spencers eyes lit up with a light seldom seen. The car drew closer to the University, weaving in and out of the campus as it went. The building loomed ever closer, and the grin on Spencers face was beginning to hurt. He didn't care._

_For the first time in three years, Spencer Reid was happy._

Strapped to a table in an unknown room, Spencer Reid began to think.

_Why is it always me? Why am I the smart one? Why do I have to wear glasses? Why does everything I do have to be logged?_

_What makes me so special?_

_All my life I have been bullied, been teased; knocked down for my knowledge of the world, knowing things that other people don't know. I have only two friends – James, and my mother! What sort of a life is that? I find comfort and closure in my mother and someone five years older than me. _

_My mother, a paranoid schizophrenic, who listens to the voices in her head more than she listens to me. Stripped naked and tied to a goalpost and she didn't notice. She was having an episode._

_James, the only person who never doubted me, at least not at first. Taught me things about life, taught me tricks. _

_Is it so hard to get someone to like you? Must they point out my flaws, as if I don't already know that I'm different? Can't they look past the smart prodigy, and to the helpless boy inside? Can they see what their loud, obnoxious opinions have done to an innocent child? Face it, at the end of the day, that's how people see me. They don't see the person who got a PhD in a year, they see a brat._

_All I want is a friend. Someone I can trust with secrets, someone who sees me for me, and not what society makes me. I want to paint my life the way I want, not the way other people want. I want to be respected. I want to walk into a room and have people stare. Not for bad reasons, no whispering as I go past. I want looks of appreciation and awe possibly. People who appreciate my work and tell me what I do good, and tell me how to improve. _

_I want a family._

_A real one._

_One thing people don't realise is when they mock and scorn and condescend, is the effect it has on the victim. They have no idea what the persons background is, what they go through every day. Going up to someone and saying "I'm glad he dumped you, you're a whore" would hurt anyone. But what's to say they were raped, and the boyfriend couldn't take the strain. What if the rape victim was called a whore during the ordeal. The person who said it would held responsible if they dropped out of school. But of course the hypothetical 'attacker' wouldn't know. They would pass it off as just another thing._

_I hate it when people do that. Say mean things, and don't worry about the effects. How it affects._

_It hurts._

_They just don't know that._


	12. The Past

**I'm so sorry for not updating when I said I would. The past few weeks have been hard, coping with the loss of my grandmother to cancer, and one of my friends slipping back into a habit that I believe no-one should take up in the first place. But either way it's been hectic. I tried writing in between school, work (i volunteer at my local library), piano lessons, exams, the funeral, and being a rock for my friends it's been hard. As of now, I should be back to regular ish updates, but thanks for hanging on.**

**This chapter is longer, and I am proud of it, but it has triggers and contains child abuse, mentions of molestation and possible rape, self harm, and suicidal thoughts. **

**There will only be one more depressing chapter, and then our boys will be on the road to recovery~ The next chapter will be titled The Present, and I will either have the third chapter as a chapter or as a new story, a sequel. It will be called 'The Future', and will be written as a flashback, with chapters of present day in between them~**

**As always, disclaimer in chapters 1 & 3. Apologies for the A/N in chapter three, because the pairing says Spencer/Reid, and it was rushed and should have said Morgan/Reid.**

**Happy reading! **

**Word count~ 1575/8148 (not including ANs and onsite changes)**

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><p>Derek Morgan was screwed. Since he had been discovered, a lot of things had happened. He titled his head back and remembered.<p>

_{Ahh shit} _

_How'd you figure…._

"_Hey Hotch what's going on?" Spoke Morgan. He was suddenly painfully aware that five sets of eyes were trained on him. "Why are you staring at me?"_

"_Look at your hand" He complied, noticing the folder, and promptly swore under his breath._

"_Damn, I told him not to. I mean I was curious, but still…..He could have left" _

_By this time the eyes that showed pure raging anger now showed blatant confusion. Prentiss broke the silence._

"_Who the hell are you talking about! You're the only one in here!"_

"_And that's precisely who I'm talkin' to. Butt out Prentiss, not ya moment to shine. Surprisingly, Reids not the only one wiv freaky shit problems" _

_Everyone was taken aback by the tone of his voice, which had dropped to a gravely baritone. 'Morgan' then shook his head a few times, and a new voice began, pitched _a lot _higher. _

"_Sorry about Jonah. He only comes out when Derry is really stressed, or has difficult choice to make. I come out when they're both pissed. Which isn't often. I came out once, but that was only 'cause Derry couldn't have Spence, and Jonah didn't want him. They both were pissed 'cause they didn't understand the feelings they were having. Reid's a sweet kid, so I can see where he's coming from."_

"_Sorry to stop you, but we haven't properly introduced. SSA Aaron Hotchner. This is SSAs Emily Prentiss, Jennifer Jareau, Penelope Garcia, and David Rossi." 'Morgan' flashed a blinding smile, one the other agents classed as rare, and spoke;_

"_Hi. I'm Dorian. I would say Derry's other half, but I share the privilege with three others. Like I said earlier, Jonah was the one before me. Annabel and Shadow only come out in times of great need. Derek doesn't count, you know, 'cause he's the host. Sorry I tend to ramble."_

_One thought ran through the minds of the group._

What the HELL.

The questioning was pretty ruthless. Derek could now see why people tended to break under Rossi and Hotches stares. _I swear if I didn't have the training to keep the alters under control I would be sobbing. _

At first they started asking simple questions;

"When were you diagnosed, and by who"

"Twelve years ago, Virginia State Hospital, Dr. Jameson Marks"

"Why wasn't it in your file?"

"I asked for it not to be included. I have them in control, unless I forget to do my meditation every night, then I waver, like today. I didn't want sympathy. If I can do the job, MPD or not, I shouldn't be held back"

Then they stepped it up - - a lot.

"Can you bring them out at will?"

"No. They're not animals Hotch"

"Can you control them?"

"Again, the answer is no"

"When you're not 'in charge' do you still see what's happening?"

"No. It's like you're in a white room, and if you get 'called out' you just disintegrate. All the others are there we talk sometimes"

"What do they look like?"

"Jonah is taller than me, white skin, white hair, red eyes, pretty muscular. Dorian is about the average size for a sixteen year old female, his hair is long and blonde, his eyes are blue, and he's lanky and effeminate. Shadow is thin but strong, average height, and black everything, apart from skin. All of the alters are white, don't know why. Anyway, Shadow tends to stay away from us. Annabel is all round average, red hair, green eyes, glasses."

They had seemed to consider this before asking one final question.

"What caused them?"

It was then that Derek snapped. He screamed, he shouted, he cried, he laughed. He knew what caused them, but he didn't trust anyone enough to tell them.

Eventually he was sedated. When he woke up, he was in a dark room strapped to a metal table.

It was rooms like this that offered the most comfort. He closed his eyes and slept.

_He was young, and afraid, and had no idea where he was. It was small and damp, a sole blanket lay on the corner, but that was it. He lay on the floor. His body was weak, he hadn't eaten since breakfast, almost 10 hours ago, that he could remember. _

_Chills raced down his spine and he shivered._

"_Help" he croaked. "Please"_

_An echoed chuckle floated down the corridor, and heavy footfall joined shortly after. They were slow and ominous and Morgan found himself shuddering. The door was pulled open and a man came in picking up his body like he was a sack of potatoes. They walked down the corridor until they got to another room, passing other people looking the same as Derek supposed he did. His limbs were heavy and he was disorientated. His clothes were removed and he was placed on a mattress. A voice boomed over crackling speakers;_

"_Client number 47, Room 2 please". A few seconds later, the door to Morgan's new room opened and a man came in, grinning manically. He knelt next to Morgan, offering him water, which took graciously. The effects were immediate, and his whole body drooped, energy leaving him until he could only blink. He tried screaming, but his mouth wouldn't move._

_He tried even harder as a large hand began the trail down his body, and he screamed silently, a tear trickling down his face._

"_PLEASE! STOP! Stop…stop…..no….no"_

_It was then his mind fractured. _

_Annabel was born._

Derek startled as he awoke, the bindings serving their purpose no matter how hard he thrashed. He flopped back down, his best efforts in vain, sweat beading on his forehead from the effort exerted.

He closed his eyes once more.

"_I _thought _I taught you better, not to keep your guard down, and get attacked, and raped. Again! Dammit, you're not seven again"_

_A cowering Derek swayed on his feet, his eyes trained on an invisible spot on the floor, fearing his fathers gaze._

"_I know father. I'm eleven."_

"_Right, which means you should be able to run faster, and be more agile, and be able to slip away easier!"_

"_I know father"_

"_THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU" Derek flinched at the tone his father was using, one rarely heard in the house. He knew his sisters had heard the entire conversation and would be wanting details later. _If I live this long…_he thought to himself. He calmed himself as much as he could and replied._

"_There were six of them father. I was too scared to move."_

_Oliver Morgan began to pace, two long fingers massaging the bridge of his nose. When he stopped, it was directly in front of Derek, and a smirk was plastered on his face._

"_Let's see if that's going to happen again" The child was confused until a hand came through the air and slapped him around the face. Then the shock set in, and, as the minutes passed, it turned to fear._

_Hit after hit rained down on his body, and every time he tried running, a large hand grabbed his ankle and pulled him back in. He was tender when he finally escaped, but he heard the whisper drift from the living room. _

"_It won't happen again." _

_His mother was at the top of the stairs, tears down her face. _

"_I tried to make him see sense before he called you down, but he wouldn't listen"_

_Smiling weakly, he wrapped his hands round his moms waist, and hugged her as much as his body could allow. _

"_It's OK" he managed to croak out._

_Dorian was born, fracturing his mind once more._

_Three years later, and Derek's Judo was progressing. But that wasn't all. In three years, his mom had divorced his dad, he's moved house, and school, and only had one friend. He was constantly bullied because of high school ignorance, namely his skin tone. Today had been worse and he was so close to doing something regretful. Inside him, emotions were burning._

_Pain._

_Anger._

_Sadness._

_Loneliness._

_Humiliation._

_Helplessness._

_Worthlessness._

_The knife was in his hand, and in one sweeping motion, blood gushed out. _

_He collapsed to the floor, the thick fluid pooling around him faster than he thought_

Just a few more minutes.

_His mom came rushing in, and shrieked, calling his sisters for an ambulance and trying to stem the flow._

_Jonah was born as soon as Derek realised he was still alive._

Derek was painfully tired by this point, longing for sleep without pain. There was a pain on his wrists and ankles that wasn't there before, but was most likely from thrashing in his 'sleep'. A tear trickled down his face as he thought of the last memory he was going to be forced to revisit. It was gruesome to say the least.

"_I __study guys like you for a living, I know more about you than you know about yourself"_

His own words had hidden meaning, because Derek hated Shadow for one reason.

Shadow was a serial killer.

And was the most wanted in the country.

Why?

He killed one hundred people in two days, all because of one life altering event.

The body count was at three hundred and forty three years ago.

Derek hated it.

He couldn't stop it.


	13. The Present

**Sorry for the wait guys, writers block and Beta-Reading got in the way. Please enjoy~ Minor swearing in this chapter xx**

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><p><strong>Three and a half years ago<strong>

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><p>Most the members of the BAU were at bar to relax, and everyone was having fun. Penelope was watching her surroundings, eyes drifting every now and then to a tipsy Morgan who was dancing with whomever he could get. Hotch and Reid had been assigned the spots of designated drivers, and were engaging in casual conversation about the errors in various Sci-Fi dramas. JJ was dancing with Elle and three men that had wandered over. Gideon had left a while ago, saying he needed his sleep.<p>

One song.

That was all it took for things to go to hell.

_Life's too short to even care at all, oh  
>I'm losing my mind, losing my mind, losing control<br>These fishes in the sea, they're staring at me, Oh oh  
>A wet world aches for a beat of a drum, Oh<em>

_If I could find a way to see this straight_  
><em>I'd run away<em>  
><em>To some fortune that I,<em>  
><em>I should have found by now<em>

_I'm waiting for this cough syrup_  
><em>to come down, come down<em>

"Come on, Reid!" shouted Morgan, alcohol clear in his breath. "Dance with me!" He went to the floor, one arm outstretched in a silent beckoning. Reid rolled his eyes and got up.

"Just so you know, I can't dance."

"Doesn't matter, Doc. No-one cares"

Reid sighed and danced, occasionally singing the odd line.

_Life's too short to even care at all, oh  
>I'm coming up now, coming up now<br>out of the blue, oh  
>These zombies in the park,<br>they're looking for my heart, oh oh  
>A dark world aches for a splash of the sun, oh oh<em>

Contrary to Reids original thoughts, dancing was pretty fun. The adrenaline in his veins was pumping frantically.

_If I could find a way to see this straight_  
><em>I'd run away<em>  
><em>To some fortune that I,<em>  
><em>I should have found by now<em>

_And so I run now to the things_  
><em>they said could restore me<em>  
><em>Restore life the way it should be<em>

_I'm waiting for this cough syrup_  
><em>to come down<em>

_Life's too short to even care at all, oh_  
><em>I'm losing my mind, losing my mind, losing control<em>

The dance got more and more heated until everyone's bodies we pressed closely together and the sound was deafening. Spencer was pressed up in a compromising position he found _very_ hard to ignore.

_If I could find a way to see this straight  
>I'd run away<br>To some fortune that I,  
>I should have found by now<em>

_And so I'd run now to the things_  
><em>they said could restore me<em>  
><em>Restore life the way it should be<em>

_I'm waiting for this cough syrup_  
><em>to come down<em>

Morgan edged closer as the song drew to an end, his body moving on its own accord.

_One more spoon of cough syrup now, whoa_

Closer.

_One more spoon of cough syrup now, whoa_

Lips met for a brief second and Reid was shocked beyond comprehension. He knew Derek was straight, and he knew his views on homosexuality. He also knew his own feelings, and wanted this to happen in a better place, without the aid of alcohol. As a result, he did the only thing he could think of, not caring for the effects.

"What the hell! Get off me! What the fuck was that about!? Don't you DARE do that again, okay?"

Morgan's eyes widened and he pushed through the crowds and ran off through the nearest exit. The rest of the BAU had been watching from the moment Spencer had stepped onto the floor, looking for good blackmail material. They had not, however, been expecting that. Hotch reached into his pocket for the meds he knew Reid would really be wanting right now. He always had them on his person, just in case. He nodded to the team, who just shrugged and left. What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them.

He pushed the pills into the genius' hands, and directed him to the bar. He inclined his head to the bartender, and wordlessly got a glass of water. He saw the younger man look at him with grateful eyes, and down the pills with a mouthful. The anti-depressants and anti-psychotics did the trick. His demeanour changed almost immediately, and he visibly calmed down.

"Thanks sir"

"No problem."

A lone figure watched through the crack of the fire escape at the drug handling, and his eyes widened. To think that he needed drugs to keep him under 'control'. And Hotch supplied them! _I don't need drugs, and I'm doing just fine._

_**§-**__Are you? Really?__**-§ **_

_Who's this?_

_**§-**__I am Shadow. I am the one for the ultimate pain; rejection. And we're going to paint this town.__**-§**_

_No!_

_**§-**__Too late pretty boy__**-§**_

**Present**

Spencer Reid let out a bloodcurdling scream, and tried to curl in on himself, the restraints that held him to his bed not helping in the slightest. In a room not too far away, the same thing was happening. People watched both of these persons, but made no move to help. They couldn't. Every single person gathered behind the one way windows knew this was the only way they could heal.


	14. The Future

**It's been a while guys, and I'm sorry. Here is the final, admittedly short chapter of Hero. But don't worry, there will be a sequel. Still so many unanswered questions! I will go into more detail about what happened between this chapter and the _Present_ chapter in the new fic, so stay tuned. I'll hopefully plan this one better, but apologies in advance. It won't be as depressing and will only contain minor flashbacks. But for now, enjoy this chapter.**

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><p><strong>The Future<strong>

**(18 months later)**

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><p>David Rossi strode through the BAU and into the teams meeting room. He knew he was late, but he knew no-one would mind much. As he went though, he walked past those rooms. He remembered the incident far too well, but did not dwell on it. The team had left it for the most part, and so should he. Unfortunately, things weren't let go that easily for Rossi, and he always supressed a shudder. He powered on, jolting himself out of his thoughts, just as he walked through the door.<p>

"Sorry I'm late. What did I miss?"

Garcia nodded an acknowledgement and began to speak.

"Bobby Smith, 9 years old, vanished 48 hours ago from a residential area, where his mother Marlene, _claims,_ to have dropped him off"

"Why are we only hearing this now?" questioned Morgan, a frown marring his features.

"Mom didn't realise he was gone. She divorced Jackson Smith 4 years ago, and now holds joint custody of Bobby. She was leaving him at his Dads for the weekend, and assumed he was in" JJ laughed, humourlessly.

"Not really going for mother of the year then is she"

"What about the Dad. Where was he?" asked Prentiss.

"He was arrested three days ago for embezzling funds from his company's account."

"This isn't good" Said Spencer, "The first 24 hours are critical in abduction cases"

"This is why we won't waste any more time." With such blunt words from Hotch the team got up from their seats, and left the meeting room.

All except for two, that is.

Reid and Morgan stayed behind, files held loosely in their hands. They ambled around the table until they were face to face. Morgan's free hand snaked around the genius' waist and pulled him close, gazing into his eyes. The deep orbs showed little emotion, apart from a pleased glint of happiness; remembrance.

"Happy anniversary, pretty boy"

"Happy anniversary"

Spencer tilted his head up, to look deeper into the face of his partner, and smiled. He surged up, and claimed those wonderful lips as his own. With little hesitation, the muscular agent returned the kiss effortlessly.

When they eventually broke apart, their breathing was slightly laboured, and Doctors cheeks were flushed.

They were happy taking each other in until a cough broke them out of their thoughts of each other. Turning towards the source, they noticed Garcia was standing there, red staining her face, clashing violently with her colourful hair.

"Um…..I forgot my…-my file…..I-I'll just grab that…..H-Hotch says you have three minutes to get to an SUV or you're walking…and Jesus guys…..you're hot"

The duo in question snorted at their friends stuttering. Morgan seized the opportunity, and Reid was more than happy to play along.

"Really? Hotch said we were hot?"

"Huh. He's really breaking the boundaries of boss/employee relationships isn't he?"

"I guess he just wants to join in"

"Knowing him, he has this room rigged with cameras and a video feed to his tablet."

"Didn't really peg him for the kinky type, but most of these micro cameras don't have sound, so let's give him a show shall we?"

"Indeed we shall"

As they began passionately making out, hands roaming everywhere, Garcia let out a little shriek of dismay. She decided to take action, and grabbed Derek around the waist and began to pull.

What she didn't expect was for her chocolate god to start kissing her. When her favourite genius joined in, she just about died. Despite the fact her desktop dreams had come true, and she didn't want it to end, she cared about the case, and had to do something.

Quickly, and with little remorse, she delivered two swift punches to their crown jewels, then ducked out of the three-way embrace, and began to run, a grin splashed across her face.

The initial pain of being hit in the nards was over quickly, the lingering pain still hovering, as they began to chase their techie around the office space.

The other members of the FBI looked up from their work when they noticed a coloured mop of hair in heels run through the bull pen, shortly followed by two men, limping slightly.

Reid noticed the stares, but paid no heed, grabbing his boyfriends hand and continuing the chase.

They eventually reached where the SUVs were parked, and immediately sobered up when they met the stern glare of their stoney faced boss.

"Get in the car."

Once they were inside and buckled in, Hotch turned round.

"I don't want to join in"

The trios eyes went wide as they looked at one another.

_Well sh*t._


	15. The Future (teaser chapter)

**I'm back. Its been a while, but I had an ****epiphany and just wrote, so there may be more updates soon. **

**This is the sequel to Hero, so you should read that first.**

**Reid/Morgan, but this is about four times more fluff than Hero. Mild trigger warnings btw, and I don't own Criminal Minds :)**

**Mild slash I guess you could say, and yeah enjoy. Fav if you want, and review if you want also.**

**Happy reading :)**

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><p>The couple had denied any attempts at staying for celebratory drinks that night, although wholly accepted the idea to go out as a team to party together for their anniversary later on. At this moment however, they had some celebrations of their own.<p>

"One year, lady-killer" smirked Reid.

"One year, lover boy" returned Morgan.

They were stood in the middle of their apartment, coats and bags strewn around them, hands on each other's waists. A single lamp provided a soft glow as a chaste kiss was placed on the smaller man's forehead.

"I love you, Spencer"

"Love you too, Derek"

There was a brief silence as they kissed each other, with a sensitivity and passion neither had had in a few weeks. During cases, they were asked to tone down the PDA to mild flirting, but this one had been particularly difficult as they had been separated due to their given tasks. But not now. They had taken back some time on the flight home, but they didn't want the rest of the team to be uncomfortable, so they waited. So what if it was a few weeks over the actual day. They'd had a nice meal out, though the team was pretty much in earshot, and that quelled most attempts at romance.

Not now. It was their time now, and both knew that.

Their lips touched once more, except this time there was more lust, more desire. Hands roamed freely across the bodies they knew so well, and drifted to comfortable positions, perfected over months. Each kiss now was more passionate than the one prior, and pale hands fumbled around the buckles, giving up and removing the shirt instead. Darker hands guided him back down, and eventually both were un-clothed, though neither shy of their bodies. Gripping each other tight, they stumbled to bedroom and fell onto the king sized bed.

Long, toned legs straddled a narrow waist and claimed the lips below as his own once more. Looking into each other's eyes with nothing more than passionate love, they knew that both of them wanted it. Eyes still locked and lips littering the lithe body with kisses, and arm fumbled around for the things they'd need. Neither wanted to gain more than pleasure, and followed the rules taught to them when they were young, albeit flawed slightly by both of their pasts.

Preparation was thorough, and sent tendrils of excitement through the bodies of the young lovers, and then in a smooth, swift movement, they became one.

The pace was set and they began; after all, they had catching up to do.

A few hours later, and the young lovers moved from their positions, and Spencer rested on Derek's chest.

"I love you" Reid said with a smile.

"And I, you" replied Morgan.

There was a brief silence, until Morgan broke it.

"Do you remember how we met?"

"Of course I do. I have an eidetic memory and that wasn't what you meant." Reid trailed off. They both smiled. "I remember"

"It hits me sometimes, how far we've come. Eighteen months ago, I hated you and we were both broken because of it, but look at us now."

"It's weird when you put it like that"

"But true"

"I guess so. I remember being finally let out of that room, and being allowed to work in private for a bit until I felt ready. And you were kept away from me, despite having problems of your own."

"It sounds like a documentary when you put it like that, pretty boy."

"Sorry babe, I forget" Reid looked up into dark eyes and grinned. "Seriously though, it was a bit surreal, when you think about it"

_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_  
>Flashback<br>_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_

"Ok Aaron, I finished his physical, and he's physically alright to go back to work. I talked to the psychologist also, and she says that it may be best if he has a delayed return, maybe works on his own for a bit. We've both decided on a new medication for him that will hopefully supress any of the urges he had before, and make him less susceptible to similar situations. It's essentially a high powered anti-depressant, with a few other 'antis' in it too. Look out for him though."

"Thank you Doctor, I'll sort him out now. What about Derek?"

"Due to the nature of the break, we've had to cross refer him, so he's got at least four psycologists. It doesn't help when the alters can't always remember what was said to another one of them. Regardless, its being sorted, and more often than not, Derek is in control. The nurses have said that he's asking for you, but as we're a bit sceptical of his condition at the moment, we advise you wait until Dr. Reid is settled first, so you don't have as much stress as before."

"That seems reasonable. Is there anything else I need to know?"

"I don't think so, but if there is, I'll let you know."

"Thank you." They shook hands, and the Doctor left the meeting room.

Since the incident, many things had been put in place, including cameras into all parts of the BAU that weren't covered before, and special rooms for their patients. Reid had a small apartment style area connected to the meeting room so that he could have a close eye kept on him, join in if he wanted to, but also have a safe place to escape to. It was locked via a pass-card, and only Hotch, Rossi and Reid possessed one. He was also gifted with his own office, so he could get work done.

The Doctor had advised him not to be alone, so Hotch and Rossi each took alternate days to stay with the genius overnight in the BAU.

When the Doctor left, Hotch knocked on the hidden door, identifiable only through the small pass-card reader.

"What do you want Hotch," came the grouchy reply. "I told you I would be busy"

"You weren't busy, so don't lie to me. I know you were listening in."

"It wasn't anything I didn't know already, so it was fine."

"Yes, well." Hotch sighed. "Never mind. I'll see you later tonight, I'm going to see Jack this afternoon. Garcia is stopping by to drop off some files soon, and email me if you get any leads on the green ones before I get back"

"Yeah, I know."

"Ok, I'll see you later Spence."

"Goodbye, Hotch"

_+_+_+_+_+ A few months later but still in a flashback +_+_+_+_+_

"I think he's ready."

"So do I."

"Dude! I'm right here"

"Yes, yes, we know" Both men replied flippantly.

"C'mon Hotch, Rossi, I've been ready for ages"

"You're whining Derek."

"No I'm not"

"Anyways, we've sorted out the arrangements, so you'll have protected and watched living for a few months, but other than that you're free."

"Wait Rossi, the nurse said you had something for us." Derek averted his eyes and nodded. He reached into his jacket and pulled out a note.

"Read it when I'm gone and I'll see you later." He swept out the room looking slightly flustered, leaving two men with identical looks of confusions on their features. Once assured that their charge had left, Rossi unfolded the note.

A minute or two later he gave it to Hotch to read. It was as follows.

_I know that it's been difficult for you. Its been difficult__for me aswell and after all those nights laying alone, I think I've realised something. I was beating myself up for years because I was too weak in my own mind but that's stopping now. Doctor Wood has made me realise that there is more to life than self destruction and I need to recognise that. I was brought up in a mostly hateful way but being in the BAU made me realise that I can change. I am a tolerant human being, and should know that there is more to life than my own problems. I've realised that I overreacted when Reid kissed me. Yes I was shocked, but I shouldn't have been that violent. That's where it all began. It was worse because when I was detoxing as one might say, I remembered that drunken night when me and him danced to cough syrup and I remember enjoying it until my stoic, arsey persona took over. I didn't want to accept the fact that my feelings were true, and little bit of me knew that Spencer loved me, but id been too caught up to act. _

_Basically sir, what I want is to apologise. To you for putting you through this, and to Reid for leading him on and ruining his life. I goofed, pretty much. And I want to make it up. All I want is to see him, or at least for him to know my feelings._

_I think I love him. I don't know. It's been so long and I miss him. _

_Let me know what you think I can do, whatever it is I'll accept. Anything is better than being in the dark. __I bet he knows that better than anyone._

_Thank you for reading I guess._

_Morgan_

_PS- I enclosed another letter. Can you give it to him please. It's a better version of what I just told you but less weird. Thanks again._

It was a shock to say the least.


End file.
